This site has been created to expand and share on some of the insights that led to the writing of It's Monday Only in Your Mind: You Are Not Your Thoughts.

Michael Cupo proposes that society does not clearly address the real cause of addiction. He has an understanding that all addictions can be overcome when that real cause is addressed and understood. – See more at:

A Tribute

Here is a tribute someone messaged to me about my book. I was so honored by this that I wanted to share it.

I have 2 online businesses, on both I posted your book, It’s Monday Only in Your Mind as reading material for 2015. Your written experience has influenced me more than any book I have read, what my M.A. in psych has taught me, 16 years of on/off therapy, Byron Katie workshops, personal interaction with Phil Lombardo, Shakit Gawin , Bob Stahl, Louise Hays and various Hay House authors that I personally know who have directed me towards my true being of love. I haven’t seen my therapist in 6 weeks. I am looking forward to a new relationship with him and with myself. Thank you so much for discovering the truth and sharing it with the world. Without meeting you, I believe you are my friend.

No True Struggle

The only time one struggles with life is when it’s made to be a struggle. This only occurs when the Conditioned Mind is in control. The mind will settle when the practice of letting go is developed.

Our struggles are neither with life nor with the people in it, so who does that leave one one with, but themselves; this is who the struggle is always with. I’m not saying that some of the things that happen are easy to accept, but the struggle is still within oneself. Sometimes it just doesn’t seem like life is fair, that it shouldn’t be so difficult, but again this struggle is only because of oneself, not because of life. The perceptions of how things are is what causes one to struggle, life is never the struggle, what goes on between one’s ears is where any so called struggles manifest. So there’s a need to allow the mind to be present so it can settle down and focus on what is actually occurring instead of creating a struggle.

It can seem at times as if there’s one thing after another, but there really isn’t, it’s just the Conditioned Mind making up a story. Each moment is independent of itself so it has nothing to do with any other moment unless it’s made so. When this is understood, tools can be developed so this happens less and less. Peace is directly linked to how much control your conditioning has over you, if there wasn’t conditioning you wouldn’t be controlled and there would be total peace. So for me this is my path and I must learn to stay on it and head in the direction of peace. It’s already there, but I need to learn not to allow my Conditioned Mind to block it from my view. The more my view is in the present moment, the more peace there is because the view to peace isn’t being blocked. So although at times it seems as if life is a struggle, the only reason this is so is because It’s allowed to be. It’s up to me to change the conditioning that blocks me from understanding I am already at peace and the key to this is to understand that life really isn’t the struggle that my Conditioned Mind makes it out to be.

A Quiet Mind Understanding

When a mind agitation arises, if it’s to be quieted the cause of why the agitation arose needs to be identified. A mind that’s agitated can’t do this, so it needs to settle if there’s to be quiet.

When it’s understood the so called problems in life are created by your own mind, it’ll also be understood the mind that creates these problems can’t solve them; simply put, a broken mind can’t fix itself. An example would be a person who uses food as a coping mechanism, at first it seems as though it provides the sought after relief, but as time goes by it affects life in a way that it no longer provides relief, it actually becomes the reason why relief is sought. This doesn’t stop the person from using food as a solution even though there are dire consequences; insanity at it’s finest. Food can be substituted with anything, what is used doesn’t really matter, how you get stuck in the agitations of the mind is the point of this.

It’s the Conditioned Mind that keeps a person stuck trying to use the same mind to create and solve problems. I did this for years and today it’s not this way. It’s not that I have a different mind, there’s a different base to process information, so in a sense it is different with the difference being, there’s a lot more quietness instead of the constant agitations. What quietness allows is being in the present moment, living and accepting what life gives me as opposed to being agitated about it. This is the way it has to be if there’s going to be peace in one’s life.

Life may seem to be the way one wants it at times, but it will never stay that way, so the key is to find peace when its not the way you think it should be; doing this without reaching for something for comfort is essential. Understanding that your own mind is creating this nonsense is the first step in establishing a true place of peace. When the origin of the mind agitations are known they can then be eliminated, it will take practice, but the choice is to remain in a mind made agitated state. So it’s vital to understand your own mind if there’s to ever be freedom from the tantalizing agitations. After all it’s not the great secrets of the Universe that are going to bring you peace, peace will only occur with the understanding of why you think in a way that doesn’t allow peace.

Comparative Thinking 

The things occurring right now mean very little because nothing inherently causes suffering, but comparing them to a time when life was considered better than it is now is where all suffering arises from.

This article is to expand on yesterday’s post a little more deeply because this subject is so important in the understanding of one’s conditioning. Here’s why wanting things different causes suffering because the moment is being compared to a time when things were the way one thought they should them. The things occurring mean little because nothing inherently causes suffering, but comparing them to a time when life was considered better than it is now is where all suffering arises from. Here are some of the ways that comparative thinking patterns control life, at least for me. Driving home from work during the week there’s usually heavy traffic, I think of a time when there’s wasn’t any traffic and that’s how I want it when there’s traffic. When my wife is in a bad mood, I want her to be in some previous mood when she was more loving. How about when I order a dessert that brought me so much satisfaction last time I had it, I’m thinking of that time, but the dessert this time is just not the same. Here’s one I think everyone goes through, when someone dies I compare that to when they were alive and alive is how I want them.

So much comparing leads to so much suffering. These are but a few, finding you own comparative thinking patterns will take awareness they exist. If this isn’t seen they will remain in control and this control will go on all day; from the very moment one begins their day. The alarm clock goes off and most people instantly think of a time when they could remain a sleep and that’s only the beginning. Maybe it’s chilly in the room and one thinks of a time when the room was warm and that’s how they would prefer it. Please take this serious because this can change the way life is viewed, but that’s only if one thinks they need their view of life to be different, and that’s only if one is comparing their life now to a time when it was considered to be better.

Comparisons Separate 

God can be likened to a made up story that arises because one compares life with and without this storied God and because of the way one is conditioned, it’s believed that life would be better with the made up story.

When I compare me to you it instantly separates us, and even when I compare me to me this causes the same separation. There is no you and me unless I compare us just as there isn’t an old me and a new me. Granted nine years ago my thinking shifted dramatically, but I was and will always be the same me. And this is how we are when there isn’t a comparison formed from the Conditioned Mind. Mostly everything that one’s does is a comparison, God is used in this way. God is but a story made up because one compares life with this storied God and without it and because of one’s conditioning one is made to believe by their own mind that life is be better with this story.

Instead of being with the suchness of your life, there’s’ always a comparison. Comparing the thinking of years ago to now, comparing ourselves to others, comparing situations of how it is and how it’s wanted, comparing the over weight me and skinnier me, comparing the younger me to the me of today, comparing the world way back when to the way it is now, comparing my beliefs to your beliefs, my God to your God, and so it goes on and on. You see, there’s truly nothing to compare to, but this comparing is so subtle that most people don’t even realize it’s being done. If some discipline isn’t developed so the mind settles to see the suchness of life, the story of comparisons will continue all the way up until the day when it’s time for one to go the next realm, only one will be comparing it to this realm.

Distracted From the Moment

Peace can only be had in the present moment and it will only occur when one isn’t being distracted and using things that keeps them from the awareness of the moment occurring right now.

The reason why it’s so difficult to stay in the present moment is because of all the distractions that we have been conditioned to use which are reinforced daily. Most are used mainly for the fulfillment of pleasure, but others are also used for a variety of reasons. What they all have in common is they’re used as a distraction to keep one from the awareness of the present moment. These distraction range from, food, social media, music, sex, the spiritual path, and many other things. There’s nothing inherently wrong with any of these, but when they’re used as a distraction from what’s occurring right now, they become a hinderance to living life in the most beneficial of ways. I know we all get caught up in many of these distractions, but regardless of what the distractions manifest as, its core and why it arises is the same; the mind has no idea how to just be.

These distractions become a hinderance to one’s well being because it keeps you locked into the distractions grip and if you’re not living in the moment, your living in the delusion of the past and future; it’s a delusion because it’s not what’s occurring right now. I lived this way for forty nine years and it’s no wonder there wasn’t much harmony in my life; I was constantly distracted looking for whatever it was I using to try and quiet this distraction. Peace can only be had in the present moment and it will only occur when one isn’t distracted from the moment occurring right now. Reach for and use anything you want, just understand there will always be a need for the next thing to reach for because that’s just the way our conditioned distractions work.

Exposing the Lie of I

Most people get sidetracked by the lie of I and this is why they don’t realize the prison cell they’re in isn’t locked. When the focus is on the thing that one adheres to, it keeps one in prison.

I is a liar. It makes you believe all kinds of things that just aren’t true. Case in point, are you the name that you were given? Let’s say your given name was different, is that who you would now be? If my name was John instead of Michael I would be a form with an identity of John instead of Michael and then my I would think of itself as John. This is just what I does, it lies, but the reality of any life is everything changes, there really isn’t anything to adhere to and anything that one does adhere to will cause suffering. This adherence to whatever it is one is stuck to becomes the prison with I as the prison guard.

To break free from this prison, one doesn’t need to let go of what they’re adhering to, one needs to only let go of I. You see, the prison cell is always open, the only thing keeping you in prison is the prison guard of I. Most people get sidetracked by the lie of I and this is why they don’t realize their prison cell isn’t locked. When the focus is on the thing that one adheres to, it keeps one in prison. Go beyond the thing being adhered to and see the true adherence is to I, when this is seen I can be let go of. This is when one will experience true freedom because it will be seen I is no longer guarding the prison cell and the door to the cell is open.

Who Struggles But I

Attachment to I makes life delusional and it’s at the core of why one struggles with life, but the struggle isn’t truly with life, it’s with I. There wouldn’t be a struggle if one didn’t attach to I and create a delusional identity.

Life is never the reason why we have struggles, it’s never personal, it just is, but it’s made personal when we attach to I. If there wasn’t this attachment to I, there would never be a struggle. It’s this way with all of life, at least this has been my experience. Life is always happening, but it’s the I attachment that makes it a struggle. The struggle is never because of what happens, it’s always because of I attaching to what happens. Look at this for yourself, can there be a struggle without I? When life is considered a struggle, who is struggling? It’s impossible to struggle without I, so if there isn’t an association with I and I isn’t attached to, what are you left with?

This isn’t as complicated as it my seem, it’s only the attachment to I that’s blocks one from their true self. It’s not that I doesn’t exist, it’s just not in the way it’s perceived. If you were punched by someone it’s felt, but the question is, who feels it? I do, but without I, no one is there to feel. So it’s the I identity that makes us attach to the struggles that cause of our inner turmoil. When the mind becomes still enough to see this, what happens is you stop attaching to I. The disassociation with I is at the core of one’s peace. As long as you are alive you exist, but you don’t have to associate your identity with I, this in turn alleviates the delusion of struggling. After all, who is it that struggles? I do, but without the association to I the struggle would not be. Become very quiet and this will be understood, by who, not I, but by the still small voice within that’s always there; it’s just not heard because of how I is attached to and used to define yourself.