The constant barrage of thoughts that have been most minds conditioned default setting for years, will not stop just because one has decided it is now time to sit.
Here is why it’s so difficult to start the process of sitting (meditation). Take your age and see all the momentum that has built up over the years. There’s so much energy pushing and controlling with past thoughts, these are energy patterns and once they’re attached to, they keep the mind agitated which won’t allow one to sit still even for one moment. The constant barrage of thoughts that have been most minds conditioned default setting will not stop just because one has now decided it is time to sit. Good luck with that because the mind ain’t gonna settle. The issue at hand is everyone is addicted to thinking in some way, it just depends how much those thoughts are attached to and this is why we are all addicts and we use different things.
It’s no different than trying stop to a speeding train, or trying to check a swing in baseball, once the motion is in full swing, it’s impossible to stop it instantly, eventually it can be stopped, but not instantly. This is why sitting to learn discipline is a process because in the beginning the momentum of one’s conditioning is to strong that most people quit before anything is revealed; in a way they can’t be blamed. I say this because of one’s conditioning isn’t truly understood a person actually ends up fighting themselves unknowing and doesn’t have the awareness to see this is even happening. Going beyond the conditioned is impossible without awareness it exist, this unawareness is very said because one is never free. Look at this or not, your life is yours to live it as you choose, but with all the years of momentum built up, maybe you don’t really have a choice, just as the batter who tried to check his swing, but the umpire said, strike three.