Even when a person is wronged and justified in “getting even” it causes more harm than it does to the other person because “getting even” keeps one in the grips to an aversion that isn’t based in love.
What you do regardless of what it is, isn’t about me unless I make it so, even if it’s something done to me. But what if it affects people I love, then what? Do I not have the right for revenge? The problem with making it about me is even if I or someone I love is hurt it doesn’t truly change anything. It doesn’t undo what is done. Revenge as in an eye for an eye doesn’t really work because it doesn’t take away the hurt. You may tell yourself it makes you feel better and you may even believe it does, and to the Conditioned Mind you will say justice is served, but it doesn’t truly change any of the facts of what happened. The mind always looks for some form of comfort and it uses revenge as one of these forms.
We say things like we hope people get what they give out in life and if they hurt others they should get what they deserve, but it doesn’t take away the pain of those who are hurt. That’s the irony of an eye for an eye, it doesn’t really make a person feel better. To me the reason why Jesus taught to turn the other cheek was not so much for the benefit of the person who is causing the harm, but for our own heart to remain in the presence of love. The mind wants an eye for an eye because it’s part of its conditioning, but for the heart to remain of love the other cheek has to be turned.
The ego will tell you to man up and attack back, seek revenge, but the heart knows if you want to remain at peace and in the presence of love, the other cheek will also have to be exposed. This is difficult as is most behavior based in love because of the conventional methods that are in place, but the alternative is to remain controlled by a mind anchored in greed, hate, and delusion; it’s a choice that will decide the direction of one’s life and its level of peace. So the more one tries to get even with someone, regardless if they’re right or wrong, the more one will be dragged down into a place that makes love a place just about impossible to live from, and if life isn’t lived from a place of love it’s not truly being lived, regardless of how much one’s revenge is justified.