When life is in control, one has to react to it with the protective tools that have been developed so you don’t get hurt. But know this, the tools developed for protection are the same ones that cause one to hurt.
To live life by principles based in spirituality doesn’t mean life becomes passive and one just let things happen. It’s really just the opposite, one becomes more aware of what’s going on in life so one has more control of it and responds to it from a place of love, instead of reacting to it from who knows where. Without awareness, life controls how things affects one and the more one wants things different, the more one reacts to life instead of responding to it.
When these reactions occur it’s because one isn’t present enough to be with what’s happening in this exact moment. Normally we’re carrying some past event into the present moment and this is what makes one a reactor, instead of a responder. It’s very difficult to remain in a state of presence on a continuous bases, but this is where the necessity to practice comes in. Without practice we’ll remain as a reactor because there won’t be the development of the necessary tools to change and become a responder.
Life is always what it is, but the way we react when certain conditions arise is determined by our conditioned thinking. What makes life different for everyone is how one develops triggers to cope with what happens in the present moment. Each of us are conditioned differently and our developed triggers activate our conditioned reactions. The more we live in the past and future, the more triggers one has and the more of a chance there is for the activation of a reaction.
When there’s awareness of the present moment, triggers don’t manifest as reactions because they aren’t activated. Triggers can only be activated when there’s unawareness of what they are. Life can be lived through the noise in the head or it can be lived in the quietness of what is occurring right now. There’s only quietness when one is without an attached story. It’s up to each individual where life is spent, the level of quietness one has, and if one’s life is based in a story or if it’s based in the quietness of the moment. When it’s based in quietness, one responds to life instead of a reacting to it caused by the trigger to create a story.